Reaching for The Stars

When the movie How To Train Your Dragon came out in theatres I was excited to take my then 3 year old daughter.  Daughter is a very princessy and girlie type of girl.  However, she loves action as well.  You just can't put her in a box because you never know what will spark her interest.  We both fell in love with the movie.  And I was stoked that she wanted a How To Train Your Dragon birthday party.  The movie was an awesome, and it touched my heart.  I'm not sure if I made the connection when I watched it at the theatre.  I was distracted by my not-so-willing-to-sit-still toddler.  Son just turned 2 last weekend. 

This time around both children were glued to the television as we watched How To Train Your Dragon for the first time since the theatre.  It had just come out and an angel of a friend brought it to us that morning.  During the first 15 minutes I was struck with the realization of how much Daughter and I could relate to Hiccup, the main character.  He was a teenage boy who was always messing things up and frustrating others.  He was always accused of not focusing or being where he should be.  He was an outcast and he was very aware of it.  His own father didn't understand him and vocalized his wish that Hiccup would just be normal like everyone else.  You see, Hiccup's people were all vikings.  Strong vikings who killed dragons.  He tried so hard to conform, his mind was always turning, he had huge plans, but they always blew up in his face. 

Now, Daughter is only 4.  She has plenty of friends.  Everyone loves her.  She is known as "the coolest kid ever" by teenagers and adults alike.  She's hilarious, she's silly, she's loving, compassionate, and extremely creative.  She is also very strong-willed and impulsive.  I struggle to teach her vital social skills so she doesn't grow up feeling like an outcast like I did--like Hiccup begins his journey feeling.  I have a member of my family who is ADHD.  He's very successful in what he does.  He's always been incredibly popular and well loved.  His charisma helped him overcome the social obstacles many youngsters with ADHD face.  I believe this is the case for my daughter.  So it's not so much the social outcast that she can relate to, it's the dreaming big, difficulty focusing, and not doing what she needs to be doing at the time.  I can identify with pretty much all of Hiccup.  Several times someone gestures toward Hiccup and says, "Stop being...this" and he replies, "But you just gestured toward all of me."  Hiccup was one very misunderstood lad.

You see, with ADHD (and if you have it you understand) one just can't fit in and conform.  Hiccup was ADHD and very strong-willed.  He might not be physically strong and burly like the other Vikings, but his will (and stubbornness) were difficult to conquer.  He couldn't be kept from his plans and schemes.  And he was a very creative boy.  He constantly thought up new plans, thought outside the box.  But because he tried so hard to be who everyone else wanted him to be (a dragon killer) he failed miserably.  It wasn't until he stopped trying to fit in the typical Viking mold that he blossomed.  His father was disappointed in Hiccup for not fitting in.  He wanted Hiccup to be a Viking.  It touched my heart because so many parents out there don't understand the way their kids are built.  They don't understand that their kids don't fit the mold and that that's ok.  It's better than ok.  In the end Hiccup is a hero and he's embraced for who he truly is.  Only Hiccup could have changed his world, because only Hiccup could dream so big and question what was always accepted as truth. 

People often tell me not to say that Daughter has ADHD.  I've had several people tell me "don't speak that into her life" or "you better pray she doesn't".  Why would I do that?  To make MY life easier?  Yes, it's a struggle to live with ADHD, but I also was never taught how to manage my weaknesses.  Instead I was told I was lazy or that I didn't care enough.  I was always in trouble because I had a deep sense of justice and right and wrong and would question authority if I felt they were being unjust.  I was also very creative in my ability to bend the rules without quite breaking them.  My daughter seems to have inherited that ability.  But why would I want to squelch who she is?  Why would I want her to "fit in" when she is destined to greatness?  Everyone has their weaknesses, but I truly feel that way my brain is wired puts me ahead of my peers.  What keeps me back is my failure to totally conquer my weaknesses.  Then again, it's only been a few years since I've realized I was ADHD. 

My advice to parents?  Support your kids in whatever they want to do.  Don't squelch their dreams no matter how big they are.  And they'll probably change their minds several times and each idea is just as big or bigger then the previous one.  Encourage them to find what they're passionate about.  Teach them to focus on one thing at a time.  As preschoolers you can teach them this by clearing away all their toys and setting one toy, game, or task at at time for them to focus on.  Limit television.  Don't limit their creativity but encourage it, though try to encourage healthy avenues for creativity.  Teach them that they can accomplish anything they want to and let no one (including themselves) tell them they can't do it.  ADHD children won't always do well in school (though some will excel given the right teachers and circumstances), they might not be widely accepted among their peers, they might never be teacher's pets.  But ADHD children have the potential to change the world.  Everything that makes them so "difficult" to deal with as children are what make them perfect candidates to become history makers.  Take some of the following as examples of people who either have been diagnosed with ADHD or who exhibited enough qualities to safely say they were likely ADHD.

Albert Einstein:  Struggled with school as a child.  Yet he changed the scientific world!  No one would doubt that Einstein was a genius. 

Ty Pennington:  Ty, the front man for Extreme Makeover Home Edition, was diagnosed with ADHD.  He was a spokesperson for ADHD Experts on Call in 2004, which seems to have since disbanded.  He was on Adderal to control his symptoms. 

Walt Disney:  His dreams could have been laughed at.  Yet look at the empire he built from those same lofty dreams.  Every child knows the name, Disney.

Hans Christian Anderson:  He wrote many classic books and tales that children and adults have loved for generations.  His creativity and imagination sparked from a mind that was wired differently than those around him.

Ansel Adams:  Captured many beautiful photographs that are worth thousands because he could see things through the lens that others could not. 

Where would we be without the inventions of Alexander Graham Bell and Thomas Edison, also thought to have ADHD? 

Could your ADHD child really become president?  John F Kennedy, Dwight D Eisenhower, and Abraham Lincoln all became president "despite" their ADHD.  I put quotations on despite because I believe it was what set them apart, what made them GREAT presidents.  No one forgets their names because of the greatness they achieved. 

Walt Disney wasn't the only movie maker with ADHD.  Do you think Jaws, or E.T. would have sparked from a lesser mind than Spielberg?  He was the first director to think  outside the box of the visual dynamics of the theatres. 

Great athletes like "Magic" Johnson and quarterback Terry Bradshaw were ADHD.  Their ADHD brains gave them the ability to take in more information at one time keeping them a step ahead of their competitors. 

The list goes on and on.  Check out more individuals who have rocked the world at http://www.adhdrelief.com/famous.html.  I'd like to end this entry with something quoted from that very site.  use it as a reminder not to put yourself or your children in a box hoping they will one day conform to "normalcy".  But instead to celebrate the gifts God has given each of us. 

Be aware that we are NOT "stupid or lazy" as some claim, but actually may be among the outstanding individuals of each passing generation.

Grace Goes A Long Way

A few weeks ago I was rushing around the house getting ready to leave for our two week vacation.  We would be flying out and the kids and I would be driving back in a new-to-us van.  I tried hard that week to not procrastinate, to get everything done, to not stress myself out at the last minute--you know, my usual MO.  I did have most everything packed a couple days in advance, but my house was a complete disaster.  I had neglected laundry for far too long.  To make it worse I had decided to go through all the kids' and my clothes that didn't fit and organize them.  Which meant adding them to the pile of laundry.  It was boxes and boxes of clothes.  The carpet in the kids' room was hidden beneath a layer of clothes.  The kids had so many toys in the toy room that I was trying to organize the toy room and get rid of half of the toys.  The kids rarely played in there because of the disorganization and lack of room to move and it's a big room.  Even at my house's cleanest it looked cluttered.  I just do not have the gift of organization and housekeeping.  I was upset and embarrassed and stressed out and felt like a total and complete failure.

It was so important to me to have the house in presentable shape because a friend had insisted on getting the keys to the house to help me organize while I was gone.  I was embarrassed that I couldn't do it on my own.  But, at the advice of another friend, I took the help.  My angel of a friend drove us to the airport that day.  I commissioned to my husband (who himself has memory problems) to remember the baby's birth certificate to proof his age to the airline.  There were too many things for me to remember and I knew I would not remember that.  Everyone was waiting on me at the end because I had forgotten to load movies onto the iPad in advance and was waiting on that.  Finally I rushed out the door and jumped into the car and off we went.  Half way to the airport I asked my husband about the birth certificate.  He had forgotten. We had to turn around and go back.  When we did we saw the door to the house was wide open.  I hadn't shut it.  I was leaving for a two week vacation and didn't shut the door.  My husband was not very happy with me, I wasn't very happy with myself.  I nearly broke down in tears.

My vacation was hectic.  It was great to see my family, to have all our kids together at the same time.  To see the grandparents so happy with the kids.  However, it was so hard for me.  I was stressed out trying to pick up after myself and the kids and to watch what I said to my parents and sister.  They tend to be very sensitive and of course I tend to say things without thinking or things that are taken the wrong way.  I was very glad to be on my way home, to say the least.  Because of unfortunate circumstances and background some in my family have issues they haven't faced.  Everyone is expected to accept it with grace and patience, and I do so willingly and not begrudgingly.  However, very rarely do I meet with grace when something I say or do is taken the wrong way with my family.  I'm not sure why this is.  Perhaps it's because they don't buy into the whole ADD thing.  Perhaps they refuse to believe anyone would have bigger issues than they do.  Perhaps it is because my husband suffers from PTSD and they don't understand it.  Whatever it is, both my husband and I see very little grace and understanding from my family.  This is a major stressor in my life.  Unfortunately, I have enough stressors in my life.  It can very well be the cause of the problems that just had me hooked up to a 30 day 24/7 heart monitor.

It's hard enough for me to keep from taking my own frustrations out on the kids, keeping from being patient and understanding with them.  I don't want my children to think that I'm not there for them, that they have to walk on eggshells around me as I had to growing up.  I want to pour grace and patience and understanding into their lives and let them know I will always believe in them.  So I had to make a decision.  It's not because I don't love my family.  I do.  I don't think they'll realize how much and how much I appreciate each one of them.  However, now I have my own little family to worry about and to protect.  My husband is my husband for life.  He and our kids depend on me.  I cannot allow extra stress to affect that.  I can't allow extra stress into their lives.  So I have decided to stop bending over backwards to accommodate anyone, family or not.  I mean the best but yet still end up offending.  I tread carefully and think about the impact of each word I say, and I am still the bad guy.  My husband works hard to help and show he cares and he is met with no benefit of the doubt.  And yet we are expected to go out of our way to show grace and forgiveness and no hard feelings.  I don't mind doing that...however, I expect the same grace and forgiveness and no hard feelings.  And until I start seeing that I will no longer put myself in a situation where I have to go out of my way to smooth feathers and unfortunately, egos.

The best part of my vacation was that I came home to a wonderfully clean and organized house.  I can't say that I haven't slacked and my dining room table/computer desk isn't covered in papers and toys right now or that I don't have a sink full of dishes, or the toy room is immaculate.  However, I can say that by the end of the day the kitchen will be cleaned, the dining room table pretty much cleared off, and the toys in the toy room picked off the floor.  What I learned this past month is that you can't do everything.  You have to know your weaknesses and try your hardest, make a game plan, work hard to overcome them and not give in to them.  However, you also have to know when to accept help when you need it, when to stand up for yourself and your family, and when you need to say "enough".

If you're reading this because you know someone with ADHD, just remember this: Grace goes a long way.  Trust me, I understand how hard it is sometimes to deal with someone with ADHD.  My husband has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Traumatic Brain Injury due to his tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.  TBI can have a lot of the symptoms of ADD.  I'm pretty sure my 4 year old daughter has ADHD (I recognize so much of myself in her).  I'm homeschooling her because of it.  It is one of the most frustrating and yet rewarding tasks I have ever taken up.  I want to lose my patience with her at times.  I want to ask her "why can't you just focus for a minute??"  And I KNOW why she can't.  Of all people I understand her.  And I still get frustrated.  I have learned to just take a step back, remember what my husband is going through or remember how frustrating learning was for me at my daughter's age.  When I take time to try and understand it is much easier for me to show grace and patience.  What is grace?  In short, realizing that we all make mistakes and harboring no hard feelings toward someone when they do make a mistake or do something that offends you.  Too often we jump to conclusions thinking that that person is doing what they are doing to offend you, oftentimes they have no clue they offended you.  And in my case, I feel badly to know I have offended someone.  Try to be more understanding.

Fortunately for me, I have an advantage when it comes to my ability to show grace to others.  I am so grateful for the grace God has shown to me that it's not hard for me to show grace to others.  I have been freely given the love and favor of God.  He knows my mind, my heart.  I am so insignificant in this world and yet He has taken the time to forgive my shortcomings and blessing me in ways I can't deny was divine.  Because I relate with such a grace I can more freely give grace.  Not to say I'm a deep well of patience, because I'm not.  Fortunately, because of the grace I always try to show my children and husband, they turn around and show me grace when I need it.  I thank God for that too, because I am far from perfect.

Some Days Are Harder Than Others...

The reason I started this blog is because I have ADD.  There aren't many people who truly understand what makes me tick and why I'm so quirky at times.  You might get your feelings hurt if you don't really understand how my mind works.  I seem like I don't care enough to remember what you told me yesterday, or that I don't find you interesting when I zone out and haven't heard you talking and I have to ask you to repeat yourself.  It's not that I don't care, it's that it takes much more effort for me to remember things people tell me or even to pay attention than those without ADD.  Some write it off as an excuse and we really don't become close friends.  Others, however, realize I'm trying my best and we become great friends.  They realize that I truly do care, perhaps more than the average person.  I'd do anything for my friends and family.

Growing up my parents didn't realize what was going on with me.  It wasn't their fault.  My mom has ADD too, so she just thought that everyone dealt with those things and other people rose above them so I should too.  My father probably just thought I was lazy.  Actually, I was told I was lazy quite a bit as a child by many different people.  It was something that festered as I grew up.  Was I really lazy?  The Bible warns against laziness and yet I was lazy.  What kind of Christian was I?  Then I would think about my performance on the job.  I had always been one of the top workers, almost a workaholic staying late to make sure I got everything done.  So I couldn't be lazy right?  I mean, you can't be both lazy and a good worker could you?  This was all before I learned that I was ADD.  I thought ADD was a joke.  Everyone dealt with that.  Everyone was flooded with several thoughts, everyone had a hard time  getting things done, everyone had trouble remembering things and paying attention.  ADD was an excuse for children to behave badly and parents to be off the hook.  After all, I was pretty well behaved as a child.  Actually, I got in trouble a lot.  Much more than my younger sister.  I was always talking back to my mom, I never got my chores done, I never got my work done at school, and I was always losing my temper.  Looking back, I got in trouble a lot because I was ADD and no one knew it.

My almost 4 year old daughter gets in trouble a lot for the same things.  It's very frustrating.  I now see the world through my mother's eyes.  I now realize why she lost her temper and yelled, because I do the same. And now that I see that, I try so hard to remember how hard it is for my daughter.  Some days are harder than others.  As a child I used to lose my temper quite often and beat up my little sister for making little annoying sounds that resonated in my head.  Looking back I see now why I burst into such fits of anger.  When everyone else could tune out the noise, I couldn't.  I couldn't tune it out because it was all I heard.  I would ask nicely, I would ask again, I would tell my parents and they would act like I was the one doing something wrong.  On the surface it was ridiculous for me to be so obsessed with a single noise no one else seemed to hear, but in reality it was like torture to me.  I've learned to control my temper and try hard to tune these things out.  Some days are harder than others.

I try to be patient with other people.  I realize that they don't really understand the amount of effort I put into so much that is so easy for them to do.  I realize how easy it is to write it off as an excuse.  I understand all that.  And so I try so hard to be patient and to endure the ribs and the subtle or not so subtle remarks.  And I try so hard not to let it get to me.  Some days are harder than others.  I try to stay positive and to not allow my aggravation and frustration get the better of me.  I try hard not to yell at my kids or let my house become a wreck.  Some days are harder than others.  Today is one of those days.  All I can do is turn to God and ask for the strength to get through yet another day.  I know in my own strength I'll yell at my children and allow my frustrations to overwhelm me.  I know I'll want to scream and to cry.  I know I will get nothing done and my house will stay in disarray.  But with God's help I can remain my composure, I can get things done, I can show patience to my children.  "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

So yes, some days are harder than others.  But when I fail, I failed because I relied on my own strength.  It looks like medication is simply not an option for me.  I'm currently wearing a heart monitor because of the craziness my body went through on Straterra.  It's not likely a stimulant would be any better.  So God is forcing me to rely more on Him.  And I don't mind.  It reminds me to grow closer to Him daily so that I can succeed daily.

Article: Parenting a Child with ADHD

I found this article interesting and hope it can help others!  You can find the original article at http://www.everydayhealth.com/adhd/parenting-a-child-with-adhd.aspx.

Parenting a Child With ADHD

Living with ADHD can be a challenge, especially if your child is the one dealing with the condition. Read this story of one mother's experience in parenting a child with ADHD.

By Diana Rodriguez

Medically reviewed by Cynthia Haines, MD

 Print  Email

Ah, the joys and trials of parenting — every parent knows them. Children are full of love and laughter, but raising kids also brings lots of challenges and frustrations. Every parent learns through time and experience how to handle them. But what if your child has ADHD? Then the whole parenting game, and all the rules, quickly change.

Parenting a Child With ADHD: One Mom's Story

Being a teacher, Christine Slawson, 48, of Fontana, Wis., was already aware of the warning signs of ADHD, and she was able to see them clearly in her own son. "I noticed the signs from early on," says Slawson. "By second grade, he was having trouble coping at school." There were complaints that he was having trouble focusing and paying attention in class, and that he was unable to settle down enough to get his work done. Even when he was younger, she’d noticed symptoms outside of school. "He was so impulsive and such a risk-taker," says Slawson.

Parenting a Child With ADHD: Understanding His Needs

Children with this disorder are just as smart and capable of learning as other children, but they may need to tackle projects, chores, and schoolwork differently than other kids.

You have to figure out what works for your child, says Slawson. That means finding out what motivates him, what helps him get and stay organized, and what help he needs from you. It's also very important to always remember that your child has different needs and a different way of approaching things than other children. These behaviors aren't intentional, and they aren't just "acting out" — and punishment isn't the answer. "If you keep giving a child punishment and he keeps doing it, it's not working," she says. "Punishment isn't a teaching tool."

Parenting a Child With ADHD: Daily Challenges

Simple activities like getting dressed, brushing teeth and hair, eating breakfast, and getting out the door with backpack, books, assignments, and lunch are all bigger challenges when your child has ADHD. It's normal for a child with ADHD to lose items, forget things, and just generally seem very disorganized.

Helping a child with ADHD get organized is key. Even a simple request like "go do your homework" may be a bit of a challenge for a child with ADHD because he doesn't really know what it takes to get the job done. Slawson said what worked for her family was to help set her son up at a study station, show him that he needed his books and papers and pencils, and take a picture of it.

They used that picture as a constant reminder and reference to help their son visualize what it looks like to be organized and prepared to do homework. What also worked for Slawson's son was a good reward system, with lots of praise and positive reinforcement when he did well.

Parenting a Child With ADHD: Getting Help

It's normal to feel stressed and frustrated — but know that you're certainly not the first parent of a child with ADHD to feel that way, and you won't be the last.

When you’re frustrated, try putting yourself in your child's shoes. As difficult as it is for you to deal with, it's much more difficult for the child living with ADHD.

"It's just really important to focus on the positives — accentuate the strengths and nurture the gifts and talents," says Slawson, who recommends joining a support group for parents of children with ADHD. There, you can talk about your experiences, learn from others, and just vent your frustrations.

Slawson's son is now 20 years old and a college graduate. He succeeded with lots of help and structure from his parents. He also had the benefit of a school system that was extremely supportive and accommodating of his learning disability, in part because of Slawson's constant involvement and proactivity when it came to schoolwork. Her son also found ways to manage his ADHD through medication and psychotherapy.

Your child can succeed, too — your job is to help figure out the best strategies and methods to help him get there.

Last Updated: 01/28/2010

This section created and produced exclusively by the editorial staff of EverydayHealth.com. © 2010 EverydayHealth.com; all rights reserved.

New Study Shows Fidgeting Helps

Why does it seem you or your child can sit in front of a television in a seeming trance and yet can't sit still while taking a test, doing work, or listening to instructions?  It seems that fidgeting might actually help the ADHD brain's ability to adequately stimulate the working memory, according to this Time article.  ADHD inhibits sufficient cortical arousal.  This means that it is difficult for the ADHD brain to process unexpected tasks.  For instance, an adult with ADHD might stop for directions and if those directions are more than 3 steps they are forgotten by the time they get back to the car.  I can't count the amount of times my husband has sent me in for directions and I came back with "Take a left at the light and a right at the...um...sorry."  This is also true for the child who is told to do a task in multiple steps or multiple tasks at one time.  The ADHD child simply cannot process that many steps.  Television, simple computer or video games, etc does not overtax the working memory.  The brain has no real need to store and retrieve information.

So why all the fidgeting?  A study by Mark Rapport reveals that children and adults with ADHD might just be using fidgeting to help stimulate short-term memory.  In the same way that sleep deprived adults will use caffeine to stimulate their brain enough to stay focused, those with ADHD are using fidgeting to stay focused.  What does this mean for you as a parent of an ADHD child?  The best thing to do is to let your child wriggle and move around as you give them instructions.  If letting them stimulate their minds to stay focused means letting them fidget, why not?  Our instincts as parents and teachers is to force the child to sit still and pay attention.  After all, a child sitting still is one paying attention, right?  Not necessarily, according to this new study.  It's hard to understand a child or even adult who has ADHD.  They don't behave in a typical manner.  That's because their brains don't operate in the typical manner.  And that's ok.  Wouldn't we rather  learn to regulate our working memories on our own and teach our children to do the same rather than relying on medication?

I know what you're thinking.  I'm thinking it too.  It's all well and good to let your child wriggle and run around while you're talking to them, but that's not likely to fly in the classroom.  It's true that many teachers just don't understand how the ADHD mind works.  Sadly, some are more concerned the children are put on medication to regulate their behavior instead of trying to understand and find new ways to help the child learn.  Now, there are great teachers out there who work hard to understand each student.  If you have such a teacher that is great!  Even so, it's not likely they'll allow your child to run around the classroom as it's distracting to other students.

However, The idea of using movement to improve focus is starting to catch on in classrooms.  Many teachers are now using exercise balls in place of chairs to help children stay focused by stimulating the brain's cortex.  Charged with the task of stabilizing on the ball awakens the brain's working memory allowing the child to stay focused and remember tasks more readily.  Other teachers are beginning to provide fidget items such as beads, stones, cool pencils, etc.  This can also work for the ADHD adult who feels the need to fidget during company meetings.

We'll have to keep an eye on this study and see if anything new and helpful comes out of it.  In the meantime, the best thing is to teach your child acceptable ways to fidget.  They can quietly tap their foot, move their fingers, move their heads, or with the teacher's approval use a stress ball.  Embracing your or your child's needs for fidgeting rather than squashing them will help foster a growing ability to self-regulate your behavior and attention span.  The better you or your child gets at understanding and regulating your behavior the less likely you'll be reliant on medication.

The idea that movement stimulates

Source:  Cloud, John.  http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1887486,00.html.  Written 3/25/2009.  

You are not alone...

It's amazing to me how many people flash me a familiar smile or nod when I mention I'm ADD.  There are some people who laugh and say it's an excuse (usually in nicer words), or those who try to convince me that everyone struggles with the same issues.  Some of these I'm convinced are ADD as well.  Others nod in agreement as if to say, "Yeah, you are!"  Then there are those who I know know all about it because they're ADD too.  I don't think people truly know the affects of ADD unless they or someone they're close to has ADD.

Occasionally, I'll run into a parent or family member who has a child with ADD or ADHD and they're not quite sure how to take the news or what it all entails.  I'm more than happy to explain that having ADD is not a bad thing.  That children with ADD are very bright and creative individuals.  They are usually several steps ahead of their peers and therefore bore easily.  It's hard to keep their attention not because something is wrong with them or that they're defiant but because there are so many things going on in their minds at any given time.  While they're peers process one thought at a time an ADD child processes several thoughts at a time.  They take in so much information that it is hard to tune out noises or other conversations in order to focus on what their parents or teachers are telling them.  Then there is the opposite end of the pendulum--the ability to hyperfocus.  I say ability in order to try and alleviate negative connotations that are associated with ADD/ADHD, but hyperfocusing can also be a weakness.  Ever notice you or your child or someone you know seems to "zone out" and it's hard to "bring them back"?  Or they seem so focused on a TV show or project that they can't seem to stop without a lot of prodding?  That is called hyperfocusing.  All that person sees at the moment is the project they are trying to finish, the TV show that has captured their interest, the video game they just have to get to the next level before quitting, even getting lost in their own thoughts or daydreams.

One problem I had in school was that I would develop these "fantasy worlds".  My creativity was off the charts and I was bored very easily.  It was an extremely bad environment for me to learn in because I was in a private school that placed us in desks away from our peers and told to work in our workbooks on our own.  We were self taught through workbooks.  I started this school at about age 8.  I never could get my work done at school except for the subjects that could hold my interest.  Everything around my little cubicle of a desk was too much of a temptation to play with.  My school supplies became a kingdom full of kings and queens and horsemen and fairies.  That was much more entertaining then multiplication and division.

If you or a family member, especially a spouse or child, has ADD just remember, it's not a bad thing.  I hate that it is even considered a disorder.  I believe ADD is a gift from God just as our personalities are God given.  It gives us the tools we need for the jobs God specifically has for us.  I learned recently that a large number of ministers are ADD.  It's not just God who recruits those with ADD either!  The CIA, the technical industry, the military, all embrace the strengths that ADD gives to a person.  I'm hoping soon we can all embrace the strengths, learn to conquer the weaknesses (who doesn't have weaknesses?) and stop labeling our children.  They don't need labels, they need tools.  I'm working on posting a few tools to help those with ADD or with loved ones with ADD as well as some topics I've been researching that relate to ADD/ADHD.  Keep an eye out!

On Medication...

I found out I had Attention Deficit Disorder about five years ago.  By the time I decided to get officially diagnosed and put on medication I realized I was pregnant.  It wasn't until three and a half years later when I wasn't pregnant or nursing and I was finally able to take medication.  They started me on Strattera at a low dosage and bumped me up gradually until I was taking 80mg a day.  After 30 days I began to feel a slight difference but not much.  The Dr bumped me up to 100mg.  After 2 weeks I felt a good difference in my focus and productivity.  I didn't stand in front of the dishwasher trying to convince myself to just unload the thing.  Nope, I had the entire kitchen clean and the dishes put away with minimal distractions.  When I saw the book on the counter I took it to the bookshelf, saw the shelves were dusty and instead of immediately dusting and forgetting about the kitchen I finished the kitchen then dusted!  That's a big deal for me if you live with me, you know.  It was a small victory but I knew it could be better.  I was excited to see that medication could help me in so many ways.

It didn't last long though.  I was feeling dizzy a lot and my heart would begin to flutter.  I began to black out and would have to fight to keep from passing out.    The black outs caused me to be a bit confused while I was trying to keep myself steady.  My friends began to worry.  I passed out in front of my daughter and scared her pretty badly.  So finally after much persuasion from my friends I went back to the Dr.  He chided me for not coming in earlier.  I figured it would go away soon...or eventually.  He sent me to a cardiologist to see if there is something wrong with my heart before trying a different medication.  I currently have to wear a 24/7 heart monitor, it's been a week so far.  It's quite a pain.  But I get to tell the children I'm turning into a robot.  Daughter's BFF, came up to me and tried to lift up my shirt in church to see if I was still a robot, so maybe I shouldn't have told her that.

Doc said if my heart comes out healthy then we can try a different medication.  However, the only other medication out there is stimulants.  I did want to try stimulants in the first place, but if the Strattera sent my body in such an uproar then I don't have much hopes for the stimulants.  I've already accepted the fact that I might have to do this without medication.  I'm not on my own though.  I know God will help me learn what I need to to become a more efficient person.  I'm hoping He's planning on sending me a maid.  That would rock.