On Medication...

I found out I had Attention Deficit Disorder about five years ago.  By the time I decided to get officially diagnosed and put on medication I realized I was pregnant.  It wasn't until three and a half years later when I wasn't pregnant or nursing and I was finally able to take medication.  They started me on Strattera at a low dosage and bumped me up gradually until I was taking 80mg a day.  After 30 days I began to feel a slight difference but not much.  The Dr bumped me up to 100mg.  After 2 weeks I felt a good difference in my focus and productivity.  I didn't stand in front of the dishwasher trying to convince myself to just unload the thing.  Nope, I had the entire kitchen clean and the dishes put away with minimal distractions.  When I saw the book on the counter I took it to the bookshelf, saw the shelves were dusty and instead of immediately dusting and forgetting about the kitchen I finished the kitchen then dusted!  That's a big deal for me if you live with me, you know.  It was a small victory but I knew it could be better.  I was excited to see that medication could help me in so many ways.

It didn't last long though.  I was feeling dizzy a lot and my heart would begin to flutter.  I began to black out and would have to fight to keep from passing out.    The black outs caused me to be a bit confused while I was trying to keep myself steady.  My friends began to worry.  I passed out in front of my daughter and scared her pretty badly.  So finally after much persuasion from my friends I went back to the Dr.  He chided me for not coming in earlier.  I figured it would go away soon...or eventually.  He sent me to a cardiologist to see if there is something wrong with my heart before trying a different medication.  I currently have to wear a 24/7 heart monitor, it's been a week so far.  It's quite a pain.  But I get to tell the children I'm turning into a robot.  Daughter's BFF, came up to me and tried to lift up my shirt in church to see if I was still a robot, so maybe I shouldn't have told her that.

Doc said if my heart comes out healthy then we can try a different medication.  However, the only other medication out there is stimulants.  I did want to try stimulants in the first place, but if the Strattera sent my body in such an uproar then I don't have much hopes for the stimulants.  I've already accepted the fact that I might have to do this without medication.  I'm not on my own though.  I know God will help me learn what I need to to become a more efficient person.  I'm hoping He's planning on sending me a maid.  That would rock.