Small Victories

I love to cook.  I love making delicious food and hearing people rave about it.  It's something I'm passionate about.  Husband says I'm crazy because I have these rules about cooking.  One such rule is that if I make a dish for a potluck and it is not completely gone by the end of the event I will not make the dish again for whatever organization or family event or group of friends.  If one person raves about it, I'll make it again for them.  But I refuse to serve a dish twice at a potluck function if it wasn't absolutely loved.  An empty dish at the end of a potluck signifies a victory for me.  Sometimes I need to gain a victory in whatever manner I can because I feel like I've failed in everything else. 

A common feeling in those with ADHD is the feeling of failure.  Failure to keep the house clean.  Failure to organize.  Failure to keep your patience with your rowdy kids.  Failure to pay the bills on time.  Even the non ADHD parent of an ADHD child will feel like a failure at times.  I know I do.  I feel like I've failed my kids this week.  I've  not lost my patience much this week.  I've actually gotten better at that, but it still doesn't seem like much of a victory to me.  Perhaps I feel like I need an all-or-nothing type of win.  Such as my potluck rule...most everyone can love my dish, but if it's not completely gone it's not a victory, I've still lost that one.  I can have oodles of patience with my kids but if I lose my cool once, I've lost that battle.  My house can be spotless, but if my kitchen is a wreck I've lost that battle too.  I organized our finances this month and completed our budget, but I forgot to send the water bill out on time--failed.  Failed.  Failed.  Failed. 

This entire past week has felt like a continual string of failures.  My kids are sick.  They are getting sicker.  I'm a single parent for the next 6 weeks and I feel like I'm failing that.  I was scheduled to teach 3 times at the church this week and had to cancel each time because my kids were sick...I failed the church.  But I can spend all my time focusing on all my perceived failures or I can remember my definite victories.  I did manage our finances in a seemingly hopeless situation.  I've been a single parent for a week now and the kids and I are still alive.  I did have my house clean at one point.  I made 2 delicious meals that were raved over by 2 different groups.  In the midst of sickness, I've made my kids laugh several times each day.  I've helped my kids recognize their victories as well.  Even though they've been in much trouble this week, I celebrate the good things they do recognizing each victory they achieve.  It's a victory win my son spills his food and immediately cleans it up instead of flinging it around and I'll celebrate that with as much flair as if made the winning touchdown.  And now, it's a new week.  I'll start off this week with a new victory.  I'm going to make something I've been dying to try--Mochi Cake.  It's a recipe I found at Week of Menus.  I love her blog because I can find so many recipes that are based off the food I love, and she has the same passion of making food that people rave about.  So today I will gain my victory and the kids and I will revel in that victory together.